


A Dying Mind

by Mandalorianess



Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:59:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25970965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mandalorianess/pseuds/Mandalorianess
Summary: “Let me go” was her whispered answer, she felt so weak, so cold.“I love you, Cara. Please, I need you” He pressed his helmeted head against hers and if he wouldn't be wearing his helmet, he could have felt the cold sweat covering her pale skin.“I love you too, you tin-headed idiot.” She isn’t even sure if she had managed to say it out loud, but his increased sobbing tells her that he must have heard her. She wanted to tell him so much more, but the ocean around her was already getting louder and darker.
Relationships: Cara Dune/The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 31





	A Dying Mind

**Author's Note:**

> As always; a big thank you to Wolfy22 for proofreading this fic <3
> 
> Be warned this one is a little darker again ;)

It was loud around her, loud and chaotic. Shots ripping the silent air and stormtroopers running around uncoordinated. But she was calm, maybe even too calm. 

Whenever everything around her became messy, she became focused, not missing any detail. There was no emotion, no fear, no anger, not even satisfaction. All these feelings came only after the danger of such a situation was decreased, only then she realized how high she was running on adrenaline, how risky some of her actions were. But was it really risky if she had calculated it all in her mind in a matter of seconds? Was it risky just because it was scarcely?

She shot Imp after Imp, but not without letting Din out of her sight because she knew right now he wasn’t only focused on getting himself out of this situation, he was also focused on the little one back in the ailing building only a few meters away from them, still undetected by imps. It’s not that she wasn’t worried about the little green monster, but she somehow managed to fade it out, she knew it was safer for him if she was focused and didn’t always think about him. But for Din, it didn't seem that easy, he was constantly looking over to the building sheltering his son, not long, only for a few milliseconds, probably not even noticeable, if someone didn’t know him, but she knew him.  
She knew him so well it sometimes scared her. She knew how he slightly tilted his head when he was confused, how he sometimes changed his voice when he was talking to the kid, knew that he appreciated it when she slept in his bunk after he had a nightmare, even though he always emphasized that she didn’t have to. Sometimes she wished he would come over to her bunk when she had a nightmare too, but she always woke up silently, covered in sweat, feeling hot and cold at the same time. Yet he would never come over to her bunk because she was too damn proud to ask, to damn proud to admit her weaknesses.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him, an Imp, on the roof of said shabby building, pointing his blaster at Din’s back.

“Din” she screamed, her voice hoarse from the dust whirling through the shimmering heat of the late afternoon.

But he didn’t hear her or at least he wasn’t reacting, because he was again looking to the entrance of the kid's shelter.

Without even thinking, she ran in his direction, without slowing down she collided with his hard armored back, tossing him out of the way, she was still struggling to keep her balance when a sharp pain hit her back, spreading through her whole torso.  
A hissed breath escaped her lips, almost out reflex she looked down at herself. Her hands were pressed against her lower left abdomen, covered in blood, trying to keep in her bowels inside.

 _‘High-velocity blaster’_ she thought. She had used these blasters herself during her time on Endor, the munition was shot at higher speed, and was designed to fly in a spinning motion, which led to a shock wave within the body it hit, causing organs and blood vessel to rupture.  
_‘Small entry wound, massive exit wound’_ she thought, finally looking up again. It felt like time was passing in slow motion, everything seemed blurry. She heard her heartbeat drumming in her ears, heard her labored and hasty breathing like it was far away, like it wasn’t even her own. She felt so heavy, like her own weight was suddenly too much for her feet to hold.

“Cara” she heard Din’s voice, filled with horror, his blurry silhouette running toward her. She felt herself stumbling, her legs were just giving in to gravity. 

“I’m going to die” she whispered before everything around her was swallowed by all-encompassing darkness.

***

With one big hop, he managed to catch her before she could hit the ground. Panic was spreading in every fiber of his body. She couldn’t die, this wasn’t supposed to happen. 

Rashly he dragged her over into the damaged building. As gentle as his shaking arms allowed it, he set her onto the cracked floor.

 _‘I can’t lose her, I can’t lose her’_ These words were constantly tossing and turning in his head, repeating themselves over and over again.

He wanted to tell her so many things, wanted to tell her that she was the best friend he ever had, even more than this, that he was in love with her, that she was the most beautiful human being he had ever seen, that she was like a warrior goddess from the old mandalorian legends, that she was the best mother his fuzzy-headed son could have. He needed her to know all these things.

With still trembling hands he ripped the medpac from her belt.

He pressed as much gauze as the medpac contained onto the big frayed exit wound, his hands were already covered in blood when he turned her slightly to fixate the gauze with bandages.  
He sat behind her and lifted her torso a little, so he could take care of the, in comparison, minor entry wound on her back. When he let her down again, the gauze, and bandages on her abdomen were already soaked with blood. 

He formed fists with his hands, pressing them against his helmet in desperation. 

_‘I can’t lose her, I can’t lose her, I can’t lose her’_

At least he knew that the Imps wouldn't be dumb enough to enter the building without a solid plan, there weren’t many left anyway.

“Cara, please” he pleaded, not even realizing that tears were running down his face and neck, soaking his shirt beneath the armor.

***

Suddenly, the blackness around her began to lighten a little, to move even. Like an ocean that was pulling her deeper and deeper.  
Abruptly the water in front of her began to smooth. Moving pictures appeared on the still not completely motionless surface.

She could see herself running toward Din, to protect him from the imp’s blaster fire, she almost felt again how she collided with his hard armor…his armor.

She was always calm and focused when the situation around her got messy, there were no emotions, no feelings, just rational thinking, and acting. She was always calm and focused when the situation around her got messy… until she wasn’t because there were feelings.  
She didn’t had to save him, he never really was in danger, the munition would have hit the beskar and all he would have got were a few bruises and maybe some minor damage on his armor, if at all. But when it came to love there was no rational thinking or acting nor could one simply shut out their love for someone else.  
She guessed she had to learn that the hard way, a way that would cost her life.

“Cara” she heard Din’s voice, filled with horror, the surrounding ocean suddenly bright and blinding, his blurry silhouette hovering over her.

“Cara, please stay with me” He sobbed.

“Let me go” was her whispered answer, she felt so weak, so cold.

“I love you, Cara. Please, I need you” He pressed his helmeted head against hers and if he wouldn't be wearing his helmet, he could have felt the cold sweat covering her pale skin.

“I love you too, you tin-headed idiot.” She isn’t even sure if she had managed to say it out loud, but his increased sobbing tells her that he must have heard her. She wanted to tell him so much more, but the ocean around her was already getting louder and darker.

“You need to let me go” she whispered “you need to think of the little one”

Another image appeared in the moving water around her.  
It shows her and her mother when she was maybe about ten years old.

“I don’t wanna learn how to braid” she screams with rage “I wanna be a warrior” 

Her mother just smiles at her knowingly “Even warriors wear braids, it's a sign of their pride and strength” she tells her. 

Cara never quite understood how her mother could have been always so patient with her, she had been a real brat.

“You want me to show you how to do a real warrior’s braid?” her mother asked and her younger self was nodding enthusiastically. 

That day her mother had shown her the braid she was still wearing every day.

Between changing images of her childhood on Alderaan, the war, the time after she left the republican army, and images of her, Din and the kid, she asks herself if she’s still dying or if she is already dead. 

***

When her limp body in his arms eventually stops breathing, he lets out a scream, a scream of frustration, of sadness and anger. 

With his sudden rage, he storms out of the building, firing his munition recklessly at everything that’s moving around him until every single Ipm around him was finally dead.

With an agonized sob he sinks down to his knee, his head cradled in his hands.

Unseen from the Mandalorian, the small green creature, he calls his son escaped his pram and snuggled up against the cold, dead body of his mother, a pained sound leaving his little mouth and unstoppable tears rolling down his wrinkled cheeks.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it even though it was sad <3
> 
> As always, I'm grateful for every comment whether it's positive or negative :)


End file.
